Tuesday, March 22, 2016

I would start this post with an Urdu quote that very much relates to my situation these days.

"Achhe waqto ki tammmanna me rahi umren rawaan; waqt aisa tha ki bas naaz uthate guzra"

Meaning: Most of the times we imagine and wait for the best times to come, but the time has its own terms and conditions, and leaves us unfulfilled and unsatisfied.

It's happening with me since past few years; I am looking forward to the future rather than living in the present. Before marriage I wanted to get married, I got married, and then I wanted everyone to love me, accept me, worked for it and succeeded to some extent. The I was waiting for my baby, worrying all the times, how I would be able to manage; many thoughts used to come to my mind, like; will I be able to adjust well with my in laws? (as I had to shift to my in laws place with the baby), she came bought happiness, I shifted to my in law's place, everything happened and taken care of well. Some days bought bad moods, post natal depression while others were happy and really satisfying.

Then I started waiting when will I go back to my own home, to my husband where I can live as per my convenience, counted days, and still counting….

But in all this I forgot that I have to live and cherish this phase also. Although I enjoy company of my daughter, my mother in law but somewhere in back of my mind, I have always been looking forward for the best times.

But now, something is changing; I have started thinking by keeping myself in their shoes.
So, what about those thoughts of going back??

I have come to the conclusion, that every time has its own share of happy moments and sad ones too (which won’t matter after a while), then why do we always wait for the perfect time to come?
I think there is no perfect time, it’s only our way of perceiving it.

PS: Zindagi Gulzar Hai :)

Loads of Love,
Annie